Wednesday, June 29, 2011


So the last few weeks Eric has been playing WoW again. His friends are back to playing, so he is playing. I don't care. If that's how he wants to spend his free time, good for him. I know he is trying to get in as much playing time as possible since the baby coming means he wont be able to play like that anymore.

But playing WoW and completely ignoring me is not OK. I don't ask for much. I understand his work is stressful and he needs to unwind. I am not asking for much. I go to bed around 10:30. I just want him to come home and cuddle up with me. I want him to remind me he is attracted to me. I don't exactly like how I look. I see a big belly and 29 pounds of weight gain.

This is just my ramblings given that I am almost 39 weeks pregnant and miserable. I feel so uncomfortable and just bleh! UGH! I am ready to not be pregnant anymore.

Monday Checkup

So Monday I had a check-up. I forgot to write about it. It was a little disappointing but I did get a few questions answered. Eric went with. I had told him a few weeks ago that I thought it was important that he go to appointments once we were on the weekly schedule. And he actually remembered that we had one this week. That made me feel better. (Follow-up blog post inc)

Baby played nice with the Dr today and she found the heartbeat easy. It was between 140 and 160. I was up a few pounds to make my total gain at 29 pounds. (I not sure how I feel about that but it is what it is. I am ready to go back to running and getting rid of all those pounds!) This midwife said they wont do a cervix check until next appointment (which is on my due date). She would have done one this week if I had asked but I didn't care. It doesn't mean much.

She said its normal not to have lost my mucous plug yet. I am also showing almost no signs of her coming anytime soon. I haven't had any contractions really (maybe 1 or 2 but they are like nothing still). The midwife said she expects to see me at my next appointment (aka I wont be going into labor in the next 11 days). Then came the piece that was a little discouraging. She implied that I will only be allowed to go 1 week post due date. Why cant all the midwives be on the same page? I was told before it was 10 days. What if Baby S isn't ready? I will probably start asking about NSTs more once we hit due date. I want Baby S to be allowed to take her time and come when she is ready. Why give her an eviction notice if we are both healthy?

So now we are just in the holding pattern. She is a living organism and has a mind/plan of her own. She will come when she is ready and no sooner (in theory). She did get her first lecture on Monday. I ordered her that she is not allowed to come before Friday. I don't want a June baby. July 1st is a special day, so if she wanted to come that day, it would be OK. But I want her to come after that. I have been planning on a July baby and want her to be a July baby!

Friday, June 24, 2011

38 weeks!

(This post was written on Friday, but not posted till the following Monday).

Today is the 38 week mark. That means only 2 more weeks (14 days) till the expected due date. But that still doesn't mean anything! The more important counter is 24 days. In 24 days or less, either she will decide she is ready to come into the world or the Dr will make her come into the world.

I am ready! I am just physically ready to be done with being pregnant. And time seems to pass so slowly now that we are at the end. It passed slow at the beginning and then it feels like it sped up and now it has slowed down again. UGH!

I am so done with this work thing! I am exhausted everyday when I get home from work, so I spend the night with my feet up resting on the couch. I usually take a nice long nap every night. The last few nights I have been working on her baby sampler. I am making progress (it seems the hardest part was really starting). I think its going to come out nicely (and it will look similar to the one my aunt made me when I was a baby).

I thought I would attached a few photos for belly comparison.
26 Weeks!

38 Weeks!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

37 week check up

So I had my 37 week check up yesterday. I weighed in 3lbs heavier (UGH). Most women are slowing down and not able to eat nearly as much at this point. I was so hopeful that would be me. NO! I am a freaking vacuum. I cant eat enough. I am super hungry all the time. NOM NOM NOM! I want all the bad stuff too. I am trying hard to watch myself but I am just hungry!

The midwife did the normal routine. Did we have any questions? (NO) IS there anything we are curious about? I mentioned the extra downward pressure and she said there are prolly some contractions mixed in with that. I keep expecting the contractions to feel like menstrual cramps (as others have described it). These pressure feelings just feel like I am gonna a monster poop out my vajayjay. (sorry... its my blog I can describe it how I feel! DEAL WITH IT!) Maybe that's what I should expect my contractions to feel like. I don't know.

She then felt my stomach. She said Baby S is still head down (which is good news and I am pretty sure at this point I would be able to tell if her 6lb body was moving back around). She said Baby S's spine is running down the right side of my stomach (right side = my right side as I see it, on lookers = left side of my body). That means her feet are sticking into my left side. I am just amazed that the midwife can tell all that just by feeling around my stomach.

After that the midwife tried to get her heartbeat. But Baby S was having NONE of that. She started moving all around and made it VERY hard for the midwife to do her job. She got her heartbeat to register for like 1-2 seconds right at the very end. about 150 bmp. I was laughing as Baby S did her best to thwart the midwife. Well at least she didn't kick her (like she did another midwife).

All is well for another week of baby growth! No mucus plug yet that I have seen.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Fathers Day

Yesterday was Eric's first fathers day. When I initially started asking him if there was anything he might as a gift (not talking anything expensive), he would tell me "I am not really a father yet". All I could think in response is "YES YOU ARE". To me, even if some how Baby S doesnt survive, he would still be a father. We would still have a baby. I would still be a mother.

So needless to say, I ignore his request for no gift. I got him a very cute card (that was about how he is going to be a great father - and thats part of why I love him). I got Baby S a winter sleeper that says "I love my Daddy". I got him the book "Go the F*** to sleep". Lastly I bought him a 4 piece set of dishes. We wanted new everyday plates, so I ordered 4 place settings (bowls, plates, small plates and cups). I think he liked the gifts. It made me feel good to surprise him with a little treat that he wasnt expecting!

Friday, June 17, 2011

37 Week Mark

Today we hit 37 weeks pregnant. That is considered full term. All that really means is that if I go into labor, I am having a baby (with no medical intervention to try and stop it). Although I really don't enjoy being pregnant, I do understand how important the next few weeks are for her growth and development. Baby S is prolly between 6 and 7 lbs right now. In the next 3 weeks (if she stays put that long) she will put on another 1lb or so of fat. But more importantly, her little brain is doing some major development! Its getting all its little wrinkles and she is fully developing her neurons! I am in no hurry to stop that process. As long as she wants to be in there, she can stay.

I don't like being pregnant. If that hasn't been clear before now! I don't like not having control of my own body. I don't like gaining weight. I don't like being sick all the time. At this point, I am so uncomfortable all the time. I don't like not knowing if some food is going to make me super sick or not until after I have eaten. I don't like not being able to go for afternoon runs to clear my head. I know a lot of women love it, but I really don't find her kicks enjoyable. At first they made me feel a bit of motion sickness type feelings but not they aren't comfortable and kinda hurt. (I feel like a bad mom/pregnant woman for feeling that last thought.)

Its weird though, already I am choosing her over myself. I am willing to be miserable so that she can get whatever she needs in womb and take as long as she wants to get out. I am sure I could talk to my dr and find one that would go ahead and induce but I know she isn't ready. I want her to be as prepared for this world as possible. So in she stays.

Here is my 37 weeks photo!

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Results Dr Apt Tuesday

Eric actually went to the apt with me. I was surprised, he hates waiting in dr offices and I can tell the few apts he has been to, its a very trying thing for him. But he is a wonderful bf/soon-to-be daddy.

I had a rough afternoon at work. I wasnt feeling good. I was hungry but couldnt find anything that I felt would really satisfy my hunger. (I am having that same issue right now). But it was more than that. Baby S stopped moving. Now thats not necessarily a bad thing but she is normally very active up until lunch and then she naps for awhile. She will pick up again in the evening and drive me nuts until I fall asleep. I started getting really worried when she wasnt moving. I was pretty sure nothing was wrong but something just didnt feel right at the same time. So I went home at 1:30pm and put my feet up for an hour before we had to leave for the appointment. And I felt a lot better after that rest hour.

The apt went well. No weight gain so that makes our grand total of 23 lbs at 36w 4d. My group strep B results came back negative. We heard her heartbeat like usual (like 150-160 range). She is still head down and that explains the shooting/stabbing pain in my lady parts. Apparently the cramps on my right side are from her kicking/pushing my liver and are normal. Everything was normal. The midwife gave me a prescription for some face med. It should help control the breakouts I am having (which at 75% cause by being pregnant). So it was a good day!

Monday, June 13, 2011

To vacinate or not!

That is the question. I am trying to work on how I feel about this topic. I know what Eric wants. He believes in vaccinations.

I am just not sure how to get unbiased information on this topic. I am starting to believe it doesnt exist. Everyone has an agenda. And its frustrating to see people call others bad parents for following a belief of one way or the other.

Here is my current "facts" that I believe including reservations I have on each comment:
1. I think vaccines are good for some reasons. Is the chicken pox vaccine necessary? I got the disease as a child and am none the worse for it. Is the flu vaccine necessary?
2. I dont want my child to have more than 1-2 shots in any visit. I know various sources say its perfectly healthy to have all the shots they list. But what happens if my child has an allergic reaction to one of the shots, how would I know which shot was the problem?

Its hard to figure out whats the right choice.

Friday, June 3, 2011

35 Weeks

So today marks 35 weeks pregnant. I am starting to feel more and more pregnant! I am ready to just have this baby already!

Nursery Update: Tuesday, Eric and I went and got a mattress for the crib. We also got a mobile but I found one I like better (so we will be returning the one we bought). then on Wednesday, I did some work in her room. I got the crib all set up. Mattress pad on the bed, sheets on the bed, bumper in the crib, blanket on the bed for decoration, pillows/stuffed animals in the crib for decoration. I moved a bookcase into her room, and start filling up her dresser. She has A LOT of clothes already. I have the next laundry basket full of stuff to take down and wash. I have my list of things I want to get this weekend to install in her room next week. I am taking it small steps at a time. Eric's mom sent us the curtains she made. They came out so amazing! We will be hanging those next week as well!

Holiday weekend update: For memorial day, I made my last pre-baby trip to Sarah's house. Saturday we hung out and just relaxed. Sam smoked some pork shoulder and it came out so yum! Then Sunday, we went out on the boat (Sam's dad came down for the weekend). We spent all day relaxing and just hanging out on the boat. I went in the water a little. Then Monday we went to one of the public beaches. That was a lot of fun. Sam/Sarah set up a tent and I could just sit in a chair under the tent. I went into the water up to my waist but the water was a little chilly. I drove home Tuesday.

Other than that... I went to my first Nats game of the season on Wed. My entire office went to a 1pm game. It was a good thing someone got our tickets in the shade cause it was really hot and muggy out. I made it till the middle of the 8th inning. That was 2.5 hours (and at that point the seat was just too uncomfortable). When I got home later, baby decided to make my life crappy. I spent the rest of the night on the couch just resting.

TONIGHT IS NKOTBSB! I am going to my last pre-baby concert! My friends and I are seeing New Kids and Backstreet boys. I am sooooooo excited.